I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
sarcasm needs its own font
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
