Dual....:-)
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
