last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
