im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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