He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
