I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
