Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
