That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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