I cockslap morals
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
