yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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