never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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