ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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