Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
