Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
