also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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