Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize
