I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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