Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
