I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Randomize
