Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize
