im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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