I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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