someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he quoted the bible to break up with me
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize