HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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