i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
