my room smells like sperm. sweet.
worst night to have a conscience
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
