Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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