some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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