You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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