where am i from again
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
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we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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