apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
