Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
