Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Randomize
