see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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