Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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