I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Randomize
