she kept yelling 'call me bella'
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize