I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Randomize
