So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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