1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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