Are we in a gay sports bar?
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
