She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
