she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
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