I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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