You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
