no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
