Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
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Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
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I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!