She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
