You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Randomize
