Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
