Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
