Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
